XXXIII

It occurred to me
That I may never be kissed again
By anyone that sets fire to my heart
For once you’ve tasted passion
And felt the burn
You can never again settle
For luke warm

-Vera Valentine

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XXXII

Every evening I feel the weight of your absence beside me
The bed sunken from the heaviness you left
And I start to sink too
My tears filling that hole beside me
My heart drowning in the emptiness you left
Hope an anchor pulling me down
Keeping me breathless
Every night is the same
Every night I drown

-Vera Valentine

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XXXI

Seeing his name appear on the screen
Made my body shake and quiver
And my stomach dry heave
He has the most violent affect on my body
But the most soothing affect on my soul

-Vera Valentine

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Dating again…

I looked at him quite seriously. My eyes full of pain. Devoid of hope
I said, “There’s really no use in dating me. My heart is a broken mess. And I won’t settle for mediocre. I want passionate, extraordinary love and I’m not willing to waste my time or energy for anything less. I’ve been broken too many times. Burned until I am nothing more than ashes. And now for the first time in my entire life, I’m content being alone. I want poems and someone to scream my name into the stars. I’m tired of being the only passionate one in a relationship. So I am done. If someone wants me, they can prove it.”

Then I took a sip of my Pinot Noir. He continued to stare at me, as if digesting my words. I thought to myself, “I surely scared him away. But you know, I don’t care. I am being honest here. Let’s not waste anyone’s time.”

Days later; he wrote me poetry. Poetry.

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XXX

What if the past isn’t real
I only imagined you in my mind
The love we had was just a dream
And you a ghost
Of the desires I hold inside

And I’ve only now been awakened
But I never can forget
The imaginary fantasy
I dream within my head

Would it hurt any less
To know that you’re not real
Would I feel the pain you caused
Or would I then be healed

-Vera Valentine

Image by Vera Valentine

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XXIX

What is it about me
That makes me so easy to let go
So easy to forget
Out of sight out of mind

I wish someone would tell me
The secret of letting go
I try to forget him too
But I fail every time

-Vera Valentine

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Blue Moon

My eyes are always searching
Expecting to see your ghost
Scanning the eyes inside a crowd
Looking for what’s missed most

And that is you my darling
My eyes are going blind
For they only see the ugliness
That you have left behind

No more blues to gaze upon
No more losing myself in your eyes
I lost the most stunning sight
These blue-green gems could find

And so we’ll go on searching
These color blind eyes and I
To see if we can replace the drab
We see in everyone’s sight

I’ll keep looking for that blue
The one that I have lost
The one that seems to haunt my dreams
The shade that makes me swoon
I’ll keep searching for that brilliant blue
Even if I must search the moon

-Vera Valentine

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One More Minute

I whispered to him…
Oh darling I can’t stop
I need to take in this view
Unphotoshopped
I need to memorize the angles of your face
The perfect blue of your eyes
The most beautiful shade
Of peachy cream skin
That God ever made
The most gorgeous pink lips
Soft and sweet
And when you speak
Or think naughty thoughts
I have to remember
How you bite the bottom part
Of your lips
To hold words in
Let me breathe in the scent of your skin
Just one more minute
Let me memorize it all
There are so many sights
I’ll need to recall
After the lights go out
And I fall back to sleep
For when I wake up
And reality seeps
Into my brain
Into my heart
I will realize
With a sudden start
It was all just a dream
All in my head
For the truth of it is
Our love is dead

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XXVIII

If I stop writing about him
I’m afraid I will forget
His eyes
And the only time in my life
That I was truly mesmerized

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