Monthly Archives: August 2013

The Life of a Boardless Surfer

I’ve spent my days testing the waters.
I’ve spent my days with one toe in, never ready to jump.
I have stood with one foot in the sea and one foot on the sand, forever straddling indecision.
I feel inside me the constant ebb and flow of my desires and dreams, rise up like a swollen wave ready to be surfed.
But, instead of jumping on my board and riding that fleeting wave, I sit safely on the shore.
Drawing dreams in the sand and talking myself out of pursuing them.
This is the life of a boardless surfer.
Forevermore chasing that elusive wave, but never balancing myself on that board to ride in the moment.
Until now…
I’ve found my board, and she’s slender and smooth and oh so sweet.
She is in my hands and I feel steady and balanced and my heart is full.
My wet suit is on, and after a lifetime of indecision…I’m finally ready to ride.

An insomniac’s struggle with words

I cannot sleep.

Words haunt me, and echo in my mind.
I try to free myself of their chains, but they keep me prisoner.
I am forever enslaved by the echo of innuendos.
Entombed by words said and unspoken.

Where is my knight with his gilded sword?
Can he cut me free from the vines of expectation that ensnare me?
Can he slay the dragon that breathes fire into my heart and burns my soul?
Can he save me with the anticipated kiss? The unsaid words laid gently upon my lips?

No, here I shall stay.
It is only I who can free myself.
There is no knight to save me.
Words have sent him away.
Just as words keep me here.
Words can be my friend or my foe.
Words can hold me captive, or set me free.
But in the end, they are only words.

Releasing the anger and the hate

I hate the way you talk.
I hate your face.
I hate the way you walk.
You were such a waste.

A waste of ten years of MY precious life.
You only caused me tears, misery and strife.

I hate your stupid smile and your condescending tone.
I hate how you text with your ridiculous phone.

I hate your eyes because they’re the windows to your soul.
I hate your chest because inside it there is a hole.

A hole where your heart is supposed to lie.
But you’re hollow and shallow, with nothing but emptiness inside.